So I did that thing today, where you ask Google for help with what you’re sure most people think is a no-brainer of a question. This time, though Google actually failed me! *cue shocked gasp*
This will shock no one I’m sure, but I am one of the ‘chronically single’. I’m not whining when I say that. Chronic is more of a time reference here, as in the medical ‘chronic’ of six months or greater. ‘a(-)cute single’ is something completely different!
There is something to be said in support of singledom. Not only can I sleep in without someone stomping through the house and waking me up at stupid o’clock, I can also wake up at said stupid o’clock if I have to, and stomp around the house begrudging the early hour loudly without fear of waking someone up. If I decide on a whim that today is a lovely day to drive interstate, I can do that (petrol permitting) without having to consult another person’s schedule to see if they can make room for that, or need to justify why I feel the middle of the week is a good idea to drive into the middle of nowhere because someone said there was a good winery/cafe up there.
My dog doesn’t really count. More than one day and she’ll be packed into the camper with me, less than that, and she only cares if I don’t bring her something back.
So why am I looking for ways for ways to pick up boys if I’m so happy with a single life? It’s simple. Just because I’m happy now, it doesn’t mean I’m not looking for that companionship that (in my opinion) every couple should have. I still have hope that somewhere out there is someone who values the benefits of single life (without the sleeping around- can you be monogamously single?) and wants to find their player two. Because that means my ideal partner is most likely just as socially inept as me, I’ve decided to keep my ‘flirt skills’ honed so my limited ability doesn’t die off completely. Besides, who among us doesn’t like the subtle ego boost that you get when a stranger tries a bit of flirting with you, It justifies that extra effort you put into your face that morning. I know I’m usually floating on cloud nine… till I pass the next reflective surface.
One thing I did notice though was that most of the search results were geared at boys. As I mentioned before, the man I usually find attractive is likely going to be as awkward as myself. That means there is going to be that forcefield between us if neither of us has the courage to approach. How to combat this? Practice the flirt! That’s why I’m using the dubiously helpful ‘google’ so that I can be ready when I finally meet that guy that want’s to travel around Australia in a campervan and laugh at horror movies and celebrities with me. At the moment, I’m leaning towards
“Are you a weeping angel? Because I can’t take my eyes off you”
For the record, I think that one would work on me.